Let's talk about separation anxiety - ~ It usually begins around 6-8 months of age. ~ It will often peak at 12 months of age. ~ During this time, your baby who was once happy to be put down and left to his own devices, will start to protest and become upset if you leave his sight or put him down. ~ This phase is NORMAL. ~ Although many parents think it is a sign they have done something wrong, it's actually a sign of healthy development. ~ In other words, it's a sign that you're actually doing a good job in fostering a healthy attachment with your child! So how do we manage separation anxiety? We manage it like any other normal, challenging stage. We dig deep and recognise that our baby need
"She doesn't actually NEED me, she just WANTS me..." What's the difference in the eyes and heart of a baby? Mama, you are your baby's world. Her Northern Star. The centre of her universe. Babies have simple needs - they need food, warmth, shelter... But they also need love and touch. They need security - to know that someone will come if they call, in the night when it's dark and scary as well as in the daylight. To know that they are safe. It's easy to forget how big this world must seem to a small baby - they need to know that they won't get lost or forgotten. So with all this considered, I'd say she actually does need you. And want you. And that's okay. That's normal. And that won't last
It's frustrating meeting so many new mothers who have been discouraged and disempowered by the people around them. Who are trying so hard to listen to their inner voice, only to be told that their instincts are wrong and they are creating bad habits. "The nurse told me that I'm breastfeeding her too much..." "The GP said he should be falling asleep without my help by now..." "My mother said I pick him up too quickly when he cries..." " A woman at my mother's group said I have to start putting her down drowsy, but awake..." Believe it or not, women do know how to mother their babies. They want to respond to their cries. They want to hold them. They want to cuddle them. They want to soothe the
Someone asked me the other day what our bedroom setup looks like so I thought I would share a picture. This is our “family room”- yep, we’re all in together: husband, 3 year old, baby, dog and me. Most people are fairly forgiving of the baby in our room - apparently that’s not completely unacceptable in Western culture. But we definitely get a lot of raised eye-brows when we admit (frankly and unapologetically) that our 3 year old still sleeps in our room too. But we love it. Yes, even my husband loves it. It just feels natural for us to all sleep close together. We are a family after all. Most nights our daughter falls asleep in her own little bed in the corner and stays there till morning
Is she STILL breastfeeding? Is she STILL waking through the night? Is she STILL using a dummy? Is she STILL wanting to be cuddled as she falls asleep? Is she STILL coming into your bed? Yes. She is. She still needs to be parented as tenderly through the night, as she is during the day. Yes. She still clings to people and objects that make her feel safe in this big scary world. Yes, she still seeks comfort when she sleeps and yes, I will still continue to offer her that comfort. Because no matter how big she looks to you... she is still my baby. {My daughter is now 3. Our breastfeeding journey ended a year ago and she now happily sleeps through the night. But, she still has a dummy to drift o
