My sweet babies - you are safe.
That is why I love this so much.
That is why I love you both sleeping beside me. Because when you are right here, in this bed, you are safe from the world and I know exactly where you are.
I can hold you in my arms and know that you feel that security. That must be nice, especially when you’re so small and the world is so big.
I think in the midst of these times it’s easy to convince ourselves that it will be like this forever. That we have unlimited time to relish these moments...
But you won’t always be this small.
I won’t always be your world.
This won’t always be your favourite place.
One day you will sleep elsewhere. In a different bed, in a different home, perhaps in a different country. The world is so vast and the enormity of it will surely hit me when you are no longer lying under this roof with me.
One day I will go to bed and I won’t know where you are. You will be off living your own lives, making your own memories, without me. The memories you do have of the days when I was your world, when you needed my physical presence so intensely in the darkness, will fade. Any reminders I give you will be laughed off: “Stop it mum, we’re not babies anymore...”
And that’s ok. As hard as it is to imagine, as bittersweet as it is, that’s how it’s meant to be. Watching you go off to make your own adventures is, of course, the end goal.
But right now, you are here. We are all together. Cuddled up in the darkness, sharing sleep.
So I will enjoy it. Even though it can be a little cramped. Even though I sometimes crave a
bit more space. Even though I occasionally wake up with a foot in my mouth...
Because right now you are safe. I *know* you are safe. And I can keep you safe.
There is no way I am taking any of that for granted.
Georgina Dowden is a mother, midwife and lactation consultant (IBCLC).
In her day to day life, she looks after her two beautiful children and also supports other families on their parenting journey.
If you would like to get in touch sleep/settling support, click here:
Home visits for breastfeeding support available if you live in the Northern Rivers of NSW.